If I knew all the words

What do you regret?

Really. Take a minute and think about it. If there was one thing, five things, ten things you could take back, what would it be?

Wish you would have spent more time with someone? Wish you would have gone back to school?

Maybe you wouldn’t have drank so much? Let loose more in college?

Spending more time with your friends?

Told someone you loved them?

Maybe you should have listened more? Applied for your dream job?

Traveled more?

Volunteered more? Ate better? Worked out more? Saved more money?

Re-connecting with someone from your past?

Asked someone to marry you?

Told someone your sorry?

Think about it, if I came up to you in the street today and asked you, “What in your lifetime do you regret?”

how would you answer?

But then again, do you really regret anything? Because at one moment it may have been exactly what you wanted?

But things change.

What do you regret?

I have arthritis. This is no secret to anyone. I walk with a limp, I can barley hold my tooth brush and most days it takes me 15 minutes before I can physically get out of bed.

I work with arthritis advocates. People who have experienced everyday victories with their disease. A day when I’m not thinking about my pain is a victory for me.  I spend more time on the phone or going to doctors appointments than I really care for.

I tell myself to be strong, but some days I can’t tell if my arthritis is killing me or making me stronger. I hope it’s making me stronger. I hope this disease is strengthening my mind, my body and my fight. It has to be making me stronger.

Why else do we face adversity in our lives? I have to believe it’s making me stronger, otherwise what else do I have to hold on to…

We make choices ever day in our lives. Some days you make more than others. Some days they are big decisions, other days they are small. But every decision brings you to the exact point you are in your life. Looking forward decide what you want from this life.

To me, fearless is not the absence of fear. It’s not being completely unafraid.

To me, fearless is having fears.

Fearless is having doubts. Lots of them.

To me, fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death.

Fearless is falling madly in love again, even though you’ve been hurt before.

Fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again… even though every time you’ve tried before, you’ve lost.

It’s fearless to have faith that someday things will change.

Fearless is having courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, even if you can’t breathe without them.

And when someone apologized to you enough times for things they will never stop doing, I think it’s fearless to stop believing them.

It’s fearless to say, “You’re NOT sorry”, and walk away.

I think loving someone despite what people think is fearless. I think allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor is fearless.

Letting go is fearless.

Then, moving on and being alright… That’s fearless too.

But no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it.

You have to believe in love stories and prince charming and happily ever after.

Because Love is fearless.